Point Of View: It's your first time coming to IMEB

If you’ve been in to see us then the rest of this will be very familiar to you.

Every new client goes through an intro call where we discuss your prior massage experience (or lack thereof), what has inspired you to seek massage now, and what made you call us. If we determine that we’re a good fit, we schedule your session! If not, we offer you a referral to a more suitable practitioner. For example, at the moment there aren’t any practitioners at IMEB who are experienced with prenatal massage, so if you’re in your second or third trimester we’d refer you to a trusted colleague who specializes in prenatal massage.

one of the rooms in our office

Great, now it’s the day of your appointment! You filled out the intake and consent forms last night so your therapist can look them over. You arrive and we greet you at the door. For a little IG video of this click here. Once you’re in the session room your therapist will check in with you briefly about how you’re doing, go over your intake form, ask any questions they might have, and answer any questions you may have. And then you get the new client spiel. It takes about 3 minutes and is very important! Every therapist will have their own spin on it, but the nuts and bolts should be the same.

The spiel:

“I come into this room with expertise in massage techniques, anatomy, physiology, muscular dysfunction, movement patterns, and so on. All of which gives me precisely zero expertise on you. I don't know your body or your experience of or in it. I don't go through what you go through. I don't feel what you feel. I have no idea, and that's where we start. That's where you come in. You're the expert on your body and as such I defer to you on all points related to your comfort. I’m an expert on massage. Let’s work together.

My desire is for you to be comfortable here. If you’re too warm or too cold or you don't like the music or something in the way I'm working with your body just doesn't feel right for you — it doesn't have to feel bad, just not right — then please say so. Anything short of ‘You're a terrible person and I hate you,’ is not going to hurt my feelings. 

My objective for you today is that you walk out of here feeling like your needs were addressed to the extent that we can in the time that we have, that you feel listened to and respected, that you're comfortable, and that you feel cared for. So at any point if you have any kind of feedback, or any ideas as to how the session could be best adjusted to suit your needs, I'm all ears. That's why we're here- to serve your needs. 
Now, I can tell you that I welcome feedback until I'm blue in the face, but the onus is on me to make sure communication is happening. It’s on me to make sure that you feel comfortable enough to give me that feedback. I've been the client on the table and there's something that I wanted to say for my own benefit, but I didn't say it. I walked away with an injury, and I know better! There is a power differential here that can make it difficult to speak up: You're in a vulnerable position, I'm the professional. Your inclination might be to think, ‘Oh, he knows what he's doing, I’ll just suffer through it.’ I do know what I’m doing… but I don't know what you're feeling and your experience matters to me. Please don’t suffer.

I will periodically check in with you and say, ‘Hey, how's it feeling?’ and make space for you to provide some kind of feedback if you have it. Or you know, sing my praises as appropriate. Whatever feedback you have, it's my job to make space for it. If I feel you tense up or flinch, or if I haven't heard from you in a minute, I'm gonna check in. Obviously, please don't feel you have to wait for me to prompt you. Even if you’re not sure how we might adjust whatever it is, please say something. This way we can work collaboratively to meet your needs.

At the end of the session, when I ask you, 'Hey, how was it?' and if for whatever reason you say, ‘Well, XYZ wasn't so great,’ I'm not going to then turn around and put it on you. I'm not going to say, ‘Well, you didn't tell me. I told you to tell me if you're uncomfortable. You didn't tell me so it's your fault.’ No. If you didn't tell me, it's because I didn't make space for you to do so. That's on me, period. That's my job.

All of that said, how are you feeling now? Is there anything else you’d like to go over before we start?”

That’s it for this post! Please leave questions, constructive criticism, and whatever is in your heart in the comments!

Photo courtesy of Lauren Hanussak.